He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Randomize