Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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