yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Randomize