i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I deserve to be covered in dicks
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Randomize
