all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
