It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
