remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize
