It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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