Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize