remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
he shaved USA in his pubs
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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