Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
