I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Randomize
