the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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