On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
