I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
