i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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