im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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