ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
