There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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