I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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