pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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