this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
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