i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
I want to make a zoo with you.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize