its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
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