im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
