im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
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