Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Tornado booty call.. dedication
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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