yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Randomize
