I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
can u get pink eye on your cock?
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
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