no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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