i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
