The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
