i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize