if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
