I want to stick my p in your. b.
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Randomize