Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
