after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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