So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
they call him Oral-B. enough said
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Randomize
