Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Randomize
