i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize