I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize