Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
jump out the window naked night went bad
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
