Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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