The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
We have started to decorate penises.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Randomize
