You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Randomize
