you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Randomize
