i jhust puked up my retainher.
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize