ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
