Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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