I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Operation Purity has been aborted
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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