I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize